Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Demon tractors plot our demise!


Speaking before the Senate Armed Services Committee Defense Secretary Robert Gates alerted the nation to a growing conspiracy against our freedoms.

”I’m concerned about the level of, frankly, subversive activity that the Iranians are carrying on in a number of places, in Latin America, particularly South America and Central America. They’re opening a lot of offices and a lot of fronts, behind which they interfere in what is going on in some of these countries. To be honest, I’m more concerned about Iranian meddling in the region than I am the Russians.”

Damn. What are those cunning Iranians up to? They did build a joint tractor factory in Venezuela and Hugo has been spreading the new tractors across the continent, even suckering Evo to donate these machines to unsuspecting farmers. But how could an army of tractors be used to advance their nefarious plot to destroy America? Oh shit...

DECEPTICONS!

It's perfect. From hidden locations across the western hemisphere these war machines are just waiting to strike at the Homeland and free their demon lord Megatron from Hoover Dam! Kiss your freedoms goodbye because we're finished.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Course if you understood that the theocratic reactionaries (oh excuse me, anti-imperialists) in Tehran killed thousands of communists in the 80's (when they weren't slaughtering iraqis in a brutal decade long war, oh only a million killed in that) you'd be less sarcastic, ultra-leftist guy.
Plus, Iran, just like any revolutionary regime, engages in and finances terrorist orgs. grow up.

El Duderino said...

Of course if you knew your history of US involvement in Latin America you would recongize the utter farce of a US Defense Sec. expressing concern over tractor factories. But, you know. I am sure you can tell us all about how Iran is secretly training terrorists in the Bolivian Amazon or something. Grow up.

Bina said...

Oh look, another anonymous genius. (Yep, that was sarcasm too. Two can play at that, pal.)

FYI, the "theocratic reactionaries" couldn't have gotten rid of the Shah (who was a US plant, plus a totalitarian and a terrormonger--look up the SAVAK sometime) without the collaboration of Iranian leftists, whom they later threw under the bus (the ingrates!). And not all Iranians are theocrats, let alone terrorists; in fact, a majority are not. Even Ahmadinejad is not, and Ahmadinejad in turn is NOT Iran. The country is politically, religiously and humanly complex. (Shocking, but true!)

But one thing is for damn sure about it--if the US had not overthrown the democratically elected Mohammed Mossadegh and installed the Shah in his place, there would be no problems between the two countries today.

BTW, your point might be better made if you actually showed us some proof that they're financing terror. And it better come from a credible site, and not some right-wing hack rag. Remember, literate people are reading this.

memoria historica said...

jajaja. makes you think wtf again about Barak keeping the bastard.

didn't the Empire finance the terrorist Contras in Nicaragua by selling coke in L.A. and also guns to Iran?

and didn't the Empire also give Saddam the chemical weapons with which to kill so many young Iranians, and basically the go-ahead to start the war anyway?

but its the Iranians we should be worried about setting up shop in Bolivia.

dv said...

Gates was asked a question about Russia being a threat and Gates responded that with oil at $40 a barrel (its been in a range $48-$32 a barrel) he does not think russia is a big threat. that if you wanted to look for a threat he would pick Iran.

He claimed that Iran has front organizations. You should be familiar with the idea - the accusation is the reason given by Morales as to why he kicked out USAID. Gates is not worried about the tractors but the other activities that the tractor donations are a front for. Like Morales was not worried about the farming and forestry aid that USaid does he was worried about the activities that this aid was supposed to be a front for.

El Duderino said...

dv,
However unlike Morales, Gates has zero documented evidence to support his concerns. Forgive us if we don't take US officials at their word.

Bina said...

Plus, there's all that Iranian oil. And Bolivian natural gas.

THOSE are the real reasons behind all this phony terror talk.